Just went over the bills.  Ummmm, not looking so good. Last month was slower than normal for a December in my business as a Scentsy Consultant.  I had to give up one show to stay with the dogs since all of our dog sitters were actually gone.  The team I manage isn’t doing as well as I expected we would for December and so the commission check came in…….”ouch!”   We will be living it lean this month. 

Which leads me to next month’s big show in Houston.  I’ve been running numbers and really do not see how I can make it.  We may have to take out of the husband’s business although I hate to do that.  I keep thinking it is time for me to find that part time job to bring up my side of the income and yet I’m so used to doing my own thing all of these years, it’s even harder to read job openings.  I just clench thinking I may have to go work for someone else.  I worked for the insurance company for over 14 years which was a telecommuting job.  More “tele” than commuting. Then quit and went full force into Scentsy managing my team, working my business, training and such.  It is an entirely different world than working 9-5.   But something has to give.  

We have plenty of items to sell out in the garage from picking up that storage unit to the rest of Munchkin’s items.  Yet we want to wait until Spring.  It will be a lot to get out and we need good weather to bring in the crowd.  (We were somewhat professionals at this for a few years). 

I guess the Lexapro is working because I’m not stressing too much over it. 

I am an entrepreneur at heart.  But with the economy the way it is, it doesn’t make that kind of lifestyle a rich living.  Chickens or feathers! Scentsy has been chickens all of these years, but some roller coasters must go down before they go back up.  I did manage to build my own website (yea).  This was something that was on my mind for over 2 years.  Munchkin just kept us so busy with her life that I never quite had the time.  It seems I finally “had the time.”  I need to learn more about the SEO and building links, it will come when I can get my interest back in it.  Right now, it was another step for me.  Each item you check off your list is a step!  Even if you have not finished it in it’s entirety, it is a step forward. 

It is harder without you.  Things we didn’t really think about before of course.  The dog thing was one.  You, Munchkin would always watch the dogs for us if we had to go away.  Now I have to drop them off to other people.  I hate doing that.  Daisy (our 17 year old Dachshund) is too old to be boarded.  But then again it was nice to just have the entire weekend to myself.  I really needed that. 

So, I give my thanks every day as to people, things, prayers that come my way.  I know we have been blessed with so much even though sometimes I fret over the small things or finance’s, I know we have been blessed.  How could we not be.  I am/was the mother of two very special girls.  These blessings will continue, I know they will.  It is not the end, but a new beginning.  Not one I know we thought would ever happen but it is what it is.  It is up to us how we see it through. 

My lights will shine as two stars twinkle in heaven.  So every time I see one, I will forever count it as a wink. 

Much love,

Mom.